Forget a Ralph Lauren Christmas—I Want a Roberto Cavalli Christmas

In a world of Carries, Mirandas, Charlottes, and Samanthas, I’m an Adriana. As in Adriana La Cerva, mob wife and fashion icon in her own right from The Sopranos. When I get dressed in the morning, there’s never the consideration of a quirky bare-abdomen belt or prim-and-proper silhouettes—I’m drawn to animal prints, sequins, and a flash of skin. And it wasn’t until “Ralph Lauren Christmas” began trending on social media that I realized that desire extended to my holiday decorations, too.

Charlotte would definitely be a fan of a Ralph Lauren Christmas (and I think at least Miranda, if not all the SATC gals, would be, too). It’s cozy, classic, and full-on Americana with touches of tartan, deep jewel tones, that cute little teddy bear seen on all the sweaters, and gold. Festive? Yes. But my dream Christmas aligns with a different brand identity. I want a Cavalli Christmas.

In a Vogue story from 2000, Sarah Mower describes Roberto Cavalli’s designs as “fluttering, animal-printed, rhinestone-studded, gold-blasted, and unmissably laminated to the curves of Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears, Madonna, Whitney Houston, Tina Turner.” It’s a brand that Adriana was drawn to on The Sopranos—she wore a tiger-motif dress from Cavalli fall 2000 in one of her most memorable scenes—and I am, too.